We Are Gathered Here Today

D&C 64:33 "Wherefore, be not weary in well-doing, for ye are laying the foundation of a great work. And out of small things proceedeth that which is great." From the beginning of a relationship, it’s all about the little things. Who is going to text first? Who is going to make the first move at the theater to hold the other’s hand? Who calls that meeting to DTR (define the relationship)? These small things lead up to other small things that tend to culminate into seemingly bigger things. Hanging out becomes dating, ring shopping becomes a proposal, choosing a florist becomes a wedding, and a simple “yes”, becomes the rest of your eternity with someone else. I look back at the path I’ve taken in life and I can recognize these “small things” that have brought about greatness. When I was a sophomore in high school, my dad lost his job and my family fell apart. My parent’s marriage crumbled and my siblings drifted apart; my older sister turned to drugs and alcohol. Becau...

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, by John M. Gottman introduces “A Seven-Week Course in Fondness and Admiration”. Through the course of seven weeks, every weekday you respond to a prompt; it’s a simple sentence that provokes kind and loving words toward your spouse. The theory behind the course is, if we practice positive and admirable thoughts toward our loved ones, it will become habit and significantly change our relationships and personal character. Sign me up! Gottman suggests that since most couples spend the weekdays apart, they tend to put their relationship on the back burner until the weekend. I can relate to this concept. Jake and I have similar work schedules, which is a huge blessing, but means that we consistently spend Monday thru Friday apart. When we get home from work our time is dedicated to recovering from the day and preparing for the next, it’s rare that we have genuine one-on-one time to feel appreciation and care from one another. Weekends are wond...

Eight positive interactions were defined and introduced in the blog post, “The Magical Relationship Ratio, According to Science”, from The Gottman Institute. These interactions include: Be interested, express affection, demonstrate they matter, intentional appreciation, find opportunities for agreement, empathize and apologize, accept your partners perspective, and make jokes (but not at their expense). I consciously put these actions to the test in my own marriage this week and recorded the outcomes; here are a few of my findings and experiences. Be interested: My husband loves the world of fitness and spends a lot of his free time working out, studying for nutrition and training certifications, or researching new techniques. He follows the lives of several famous athletes through social media and often tells me about their latest P.R. or torn ligaments. I usually just nod and “mhm” through the conversation until he notices my disinterest and changes the conversation. This week I ...

Elder Bruce C. Hafen in his talk, "Covenant Marriage", advises that in our marriages, we take conscious precautions against three “wolves”. Not three, friendly little pigs who have little to no education on the art of construction. Not three picky bears who delight in spending time with golden haired girls, eating room temperature porridge. Natural adversity, personal imperfections, and extreme individualism; these wolves may invite you for dinner, but you’ll have to put up a fight to make it out alive. This is no bedtime story; this is the real world knocking at your door and working to tear down your marriage.  Natural adversities are inescapable because of the Fall of Adam, but we know the necessity of this event due to our faith in God’s Plan of Salvation. Just as the Fall is necessary to humanities salvation, our own difficulties are essential for our individual salvation and our family’s exaltation. In our three years together, my husband and I have already faced nat...

A couple of weeks ago our prophet, President Russell M. Nelson shared a special message with us as church members in a broadcast. My husband and I listened to his address together later that evening when we returned home from work. Being so close to General Conference, we knew his words had to be important if he was making such an effort to share them now. President Nelson shared a message of God’s love and the unchanging truth of His gospel. The words shared were riveting and soul calming, they were truly inspired by our Heavenly Father. As we can see from our reading this week, the world focuses on the now more than on an eternal perspective. Many of God’s children are unaware of His love for them and what that can mean for their personal salvation. As the world gets further away from God’s plan, we can rely on the truths of this gospel to keep us on the right path. The truths of the gospel are unchanging, including those in relation to same sex relations. I would like to share th...