Week 9: Consecration

As members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, we hear the word ‘consecrate’, in a lot of different contexts. We use consecrated oil in priesthood blessings, we live the Law of Consecration, and are asked to consecrate all we have to the building up of God’s kingdom.
The Bible Dictionary defines consecrate, “To dedicate, to make holy, or to become righteous.” With this definition, how do we apply this to our marriages? How do I consecrate myself to my husband and to the covenants we have made?
Elder L.G. Robbins gave an enlightening address in 1998 titled, “Agency and Anger.” Elder Robbins shared an insight from author William Wilbanks; he said, “Aggression … suppressing the anger, talking about it, screaming and yelling, are all learned strategies in dealing with anger. We choose the one that has proved effective for us in the past. Ever notice how seldom we lose control when frustrated by our boss, but how often we do when annoyed by friends or family?”
I will openly admit that there are a dozen occurrences in the past few weeks where I have taken my anger out on my husband; this is not dedicated, holy, or righteous behavior. Consecrating myself to my marriage means putting these negative actions aside and replacing them with service. 3 Nephi 11:29-30 states this perfectly, “Behold, this is not my doctrine, to stir up the hearts of men with anger, one against another; but this is my doctrine, that such things should be done away”.
While studying this week, I have been extra cautious of my choices to be angry or frustrated. I have made conscious efforts to go beyond my normal routines and take opportunities to show love by serving my husband in small, meaningful ways. Focusing on my husband’s needs and finding ways to make our marriage better has healed me of feelings of frustration. I have no need to choose frustration when I am actively choosing a brighter, more consecrated path.
On Saturday, I came home from the gym around 11 a.m. and our house was a mess. My in-laws had just left after staying for a week and things got out of hand while they were gone. I had mounds of laundry to do, a sink full of dishes and clutter all over the living room and bedroom. I felt defeated and annoyed that we had let it get so messy, and I felt frustrated that my husband was conveniently still at the gym, leaving me to clean by myself!
Standing in the middle of the house, overwhelmed and upset, I recalled our readings for this week. I chose to not be angry or frustrated as Elder Robbins suggested. I decided to change my mindset and instead of cleaning the house for me, I was going to clean it for my husband Jake. I made the decision to take this opportunity to serve Jake which made the process far more enjoyable! With a positive attitude I was able to finish everything while he was out so that he could enjoy the rest of his weekend in a clean home.
By simply turning outward and choosing to have a more loving, service-oriented attitude toward this everyday situation, I came to love my husband even more. Serving others truly does build relationships, even if it’s something as silly as scrubbing the toilet for them! Consecrating myself to my marriage is a daily effort. Luckily, through the Lord’s perfect plan, daily effort is enough.

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