Week 13: In-laws

My husband and I have been married for 2 years and come from very different family backgrounds. My family is very warm and accepting, they live to please others. My in-laws are more restrictive in their relationships and are less affectionate and caring in general. Coming from a home where you pretended to like everyone, even if they were your worst enemy, it has been difficult to blend with a family that is very honest and open with their true feelings.
My sister in law and I knew each other before I met my husband and had some experiences that left us far from being friends. Because of the opinions my sister in-law had of me, I have had difficult relationships with each of my in-laws before I’d even met them; from the very beginning, I didn’t stand a chance! The contention that lived between my sister in-law and I for so many years has created walls between our families that are intimidating and seem unlikely to fall.
I have been hurt by the obvious distance my in-laws place between themselves and me during family outings or in conversations; as very honest people, they have no reservations in making it known that I am not accepted. The time I spend with them is emotionally exhausting and hard on my self-confidence so my drive to make changes and put in further effort is minimal.
As I was studying this week, I recognized a need for change. I stopped putting the blame on my family and took responsibility for the part I can play in healing our relationships. I prayed for ways to reach out to my family members and for inspiration on how to connect better with them. Even just praying for them daily helped soften my heart toward them and I was able to better recognize them as my eternal family. With that in mind, it promotes more drive to strengthen my relationships with them.
After praying this past week, I was inspired to text my sister in law about something that had happened. It was easily a situation I would have sought advice from another family member or friend, but I took this prompting in hopes that it would give us an opportunity to talk and build a relationship outside of our teen years and now in adulthood as family. My heart was pounding while I waited for a response, but just as I’d hoped, it ended up being a great way for me to reach out for her friendship.

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